Not the Same Person Anymore
by islashlove
Summary: Shawn Spencer returns to Santa Barbara after he mysteriously disappeared ten years earlier. But he is no longer the man they knew. Shawn has changed. Changed a lot and in many ways. Why did Shawn just disappear? Why didn't he keep in touch like he had in the past? And can those who care about and love him, accept that this 'new' person is really their Shawn?
1. 1985

**Disclaimer:**** I do not own anything that is from Psych. **

**Beta:**** Yes, I would like to say thank you to my Beta jerseybelle**

**Warning:**** Mention of rape, physical and emotional abuse and torture. This is a slash story which means same sex relationships. If you don't like it, don't read it.**

**Author's Notes:**** I really have no idea where this story can from. It just popped into my head and refused to leave. **

**This is an OOC, a Non Cannon and an Alternative Universe Story.**

**Story Notes:**** Shawn Spencer returns to Santa Barbara after he mysteriously disappeared ten years earlier. But he is no longer the man they knew. Shawn has changed. Changed a lot and in many ways. Why did Shawn just disappear? Why didn't he keep in touch like he had in the past? And can those who care about and love him, accept that this 'new' person is really their Shawn?**

**Not the Same Person Anymore:**** By islashlove**

**Chapter 1:**** 1985**

Ten year old Burton Guster stood outside his bathroom door calling out to his best friend Shawn Spencer, who was on the other side.

"Come on, Shawn, I'm busting."

"Just a minute, Gus, I'll...ouch." Gus listened as metal hit ceramic.

"Shawn..."

Gus was now very worried. Shawn had been acting very strange lately or rather, stranger than usual for Shawn.

"Shawn, let me in."

Gus was now banging on the door. Just as Gus was just about to go and get his mum he heard the door unlock so he walked in. Standing at the sink was Shawn. He was holding a washcloth to his face with one hand and his pocket knife with the other. Lying beside him on the counter was a rubber mask and a spot of blood was forming on the washcloth and there were tears in Shawn's eyes.

"What have you been doing?"

"I, I thought that if I could change the way I looked Dad wouldn't know who I am and he won't make me do the hat trick anymore."

"Shawn, that's stupid. You look the way you do for a reason, you just can't change the way you look."

"Yes I can. I saw it on TV a show called...Return to Eden. The woman in that had her face eaten off by alligators and they gave her a new one."

"Shawn, that's just a TV show, now give me the knife," Gus said holding out this hand.

Shawn hesitated, but still handed over the knife.

"Now promise me you won't try this again."

"Gus..."

"Promise me, Shawn."

"Ok, I promise I won't change the way my face looks."

Satisfied that was it, Gus took Shawn to see his mum so she could treat his cut.

The next day Gus went to Shawn's after school. He knew Shawn wouldn't be there, but he wanted to returned Shawn's knife and the mask to Mr. Spencer.

"Gus, Shawn isn't here at the moment."

"I know that, Mr. Spencer I...I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Ok, come inside."

The two of them walked inside and over to the couch. Mr. Spencer could see that Gus was scared and worried about something. Well, Gus always looked scared, there wasn't anything new in that, but it was the worried look that concerned Mr. Spencer right then. After getting Gus a drink of water, Mr. Spencer sat down in front of the young boy and waited for him to speak.

At first Gus didn't speak, he just sat there thinking. After working out what he was going to say, Gus reached into his school bag and pulled out a small plastic bag and passed it to Mr. Spencer. Henry gave the bag and Gus a curious look before opening it. Inside he found the rubber mask and wrapped inside of that, he found the knife.

"They belong to Shawn," Gus offered as an explanation as to why he gave them to him. "I caught Shawn trying to do something stupid with them last night and I took them off him. I wasn't going to tell on him, but I'm worried he's going to try and do it again."

"Try what, Gus?"

"He, he was going to cut his face off so he could replace it with that mask. Shawn said that he saw it done on a show call Return to Eden."

"Did Shawn say why he wanted to change the way he looked?"

"Yes sir, he said that he want to look differently so you wouldn't recognise him and make him do the hat trick anymore."

"Ok, Gus..."

"I'm just worried that..."

"It's ok. I'll deal with it from this point on and I won't let him know that you told me, but I'm glad you did. We need to keep an eye on Shawn for his own safety, do you understand?"

"Yes sir."

"Now you better head home."

"Thank you, Mr. Spencer." Gus then headed home. He felt guilty that he told on Shawn, but he also felt he had done the right thing.

**Later that night**

"Dad, I'm home."

"Ok, Shawn, how were your grandparents?"

"Good. Granddad and I played battleships and Grandma baked some cookies and cake. What's for dinner?"

"Steak and vegetables with ice cream and custard for desert, how's that sound?"

"Great, will Mum be home in time to join us?"

"I'm not sure. Now, will you set the table...whoa there...what happened?" Henry said as he turned to look at Shawn.

"Happened? I don't know what you mean."

"Shawn..." Henry said as he stood there with his hands on his hips. "What happened to your face?"

"Oh...that. I ran into a tree at school and cut it."

"Really, Shawn?" Henry said raising his eye brow. "The school would have called me about it."

"They...I cut myself."

"Why did you cut yourself?"

"Well...maybe we should sit down first."

"Ok, you head over and I will take the steak off the grill."

After they sat down, Shawn took a sip of water his dad had brought over.

"Well…Shawn."

"Well, at Gus' last night I cut myself."

"I know about you cutting yourself, but Mrs. Guster said you had slipped in the bathroom."

"That's what Gus and I told her had happened."

"So what really happened?"

"I, I'm tired, Dad. Tired of all the lessons and I thought that if I changed my face like that woman on Return to Eden did, you wouldn't recognise me and the lessons would stop."

"Ok, and what was with the mask?"

"Well, they said she had plastic surgery."

"Ahh...plastic surgery is a phrase. In other words, it's fake, not real, and she had it done because of the damage done to her face, not because she wanted it. Shawn…" Henry said as he leaned forward.

"Yes, Dad."

"How do you think your mother and I would have felt if you had died trying to do this? And what about Gus and his parents?"

"I didn't think about you or them, but the lessons..."

"Shawn, you should have talked to me about it. I won't stop the lessons but I might ease off on the number of lessons I give you."

"Really you will back off a bit."

"I might, but we need to talk about it, don't we? Now, I've got to get dinner ready and you need to get cleaned up." As Shawn got up and headed towards his bedroom Henry called out. "Shawn, just promise me that you won't try and do this again?"

"I promise. I promise that I won't try and change my face again.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	2. Forty Years Later

**Chapter 2:**** Forty Years Later**

"God, I love you, Lassie, and I promise that I will never leave your side," Shawn said as he leaned across the table.

Lassiter and Shawn had been secretly dating for the last two months and Shawn had cooked them a 'two month' anniversary dinner.

"I love you too, Spencer, and if you ever do leave my side, I will never stop looking for you. Not until I find you again that is. Happy anniversary, Shawn." Leaning in to give Shawn a kiss Lassiter was surprised to find Shawn pulling away and then heading for the front door.

"Where are you going?" Lassiter asked as a strange feeling of dread started to rise up in his stomach.

"Come and find me," Shawn playfully called out as he opened the door, but beyond the door wasn't the street. Instead it was a swirling blackness.

"Shawn…" Lassiter called out and when Shawn turned to face him, Lassiter could see fear, hurt, pain and tears in Shawn's eyes.

"Find me, Lassie. Please find me." And with that Shawn was gone and the door slammed shut.

Lassiter rushed the door, but couldn't open it. Trying to break it down with his fists, Lassiter kept calling out Shawn's name.

"SPENCER!" Lassiter screamed as he shot up in his bed.

He looked around with his eyes wide open. Lassiter's heavy breathing was the only sound that broke the quietness of the night and the moonlight danced on his bed as the curtains moved in a light breeze. His was covered in a heavy sweat that was causing his cloths and hair to cling to his body; the same sweat that was now making Lassiter shiver. Getting up, Lassiter made his way to the nearby bathroom.

'_Ten years. God damn it. It's been ten years. So why am I still having these dreams?'_ Lassiter thought to himself. _'Shawn...where are you? Why did you leave? What did I ever do to make you go?'_ These questions and more have been running around Lassiter's head every day for the last ten years, ever since Shawn walked out of the door that night, never to be seen or heard from again.

These last ten years had haunted Lassiter and not one day went by without Shawn being in his thoughts or him chasing a lead as to where Shawn could be. Henry and Guster hadn't been any help. They just put it down to Shawn being Shawn and that he had just left and that he would come back when he was ready.

Lassiter looked into the mirror and was not surprised at the face that looked back at him. Other than the signs of aging, Lassiter could see that the years of looking for Shawn had taken its toll on him, but he wasn't going to stop looking until he found him.

Since it was no use to try to go back to sleep, Lassiter decided to have a hot shower. As the burning water washed away the sweat and tension of the nightmare, Lassiter closed his eyes and just as usual, right there behind his eye lids was Shawn's smiling face. But he made the mistake of keeping them closed for too long and the face started to morph into the face of his nightmare, the face of fear and pain.

Lassiter wanted it to stop and he slammed his hands into the shower wall. He wanted the dreams to stop. He wanted to know that Shawn was ok and he wanted Shawn back. Back in Santa Barbara and back in his arms. Just as he went to open his eyes, Shawn's face changed again. God, he wanted to open his eyes, but this had never happened before and he hoped that it was going to be Shawn's happy, smiling face, but what he got wasn't what he was expecting.

It was a face of a person he didn't know. A face which had the saddest eyes he had ever seen; eyes which had no soul.

Lassiter's eyes shot open, but the haunting eyes and face were still there. Who was this man? Why did Lassiter have the feeling that he knew him and more importantly, why did he have this…feeling that he could lead him to Shawn.

Just as he climbed out of the shower his phone rang. Lassiter pressed the answer button and put it on speaker as he got dressed.

"Lassiter, here," Lassiter said in his tired voice.

"Carlton, it's Juliet."

"Yes, Juliet, what's up?"

"A body has been found and we need to check it out."

"Ok, give me the address and I'll meet you there."

Juliet gave him the address. "I'll see you when you get here."

Lassiter listened as the dial tone echoed through his empty house.

It only took him a few second to finish getting ready and he made his way to the crime scene. When Lassiter arrived, Juliet and McNab were already there and a perimeter had been put in place as the usual crowd of people had gathered. Lassiter made his way to the front door of the house where Juliet was standing with another officer. As he approach, Juliet turned around gave him a smile then returned to finish what she was saying to the officer. Once finished, she returned her attention back to Lassiter.

"Good to see you, Carlton."

"What do we have?"

"Well," Juliet said as they walked into the house it looks like the same person did this as the last two. Home owner has had his head smashed in and the weapon is missing."

"Was anyone else in the house?"

"We haven't found anyone yet."

Lassiter surveyed the room; it was just like the other two. The victim was lying face down in the middle of the room. The entire back of his head had been smashed in and there didn't seem to be anything taken. No, this person wasn't doing this to steal anything; they were doing this just for the thrill of killing.

As they left the house, Lassiter looked around at the crowd and wondered if the killer was amongst them. Spencer would have been able to tell.

Lassiter was just about to head to his car when he saw him. The man whose face he'd seen that morning in the shower; the face that had those sad, soulless eyes and they were looking straight at him.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	3. The Note

**Author's Notes: ****Hi, I am just letting all of you; my lovely readers know that the sequel to 'The Marriage Proposal' has been written and is being posted at the moment in the crossover section. It is a cross over between Psych and Diagnosis Murder and is called 'Shot by the Past'.**

**Story Notes:**** Just letting you know I have changed the title of chapter two, to Forty years instead of Thirty years later. A few people questioned me on the age of Shawn and I realised where I had made a mistake. This allows me to be in line with the show, such as.**

**The history starts with Shawn at the age of 10 and then he leaves Santa Barbara at the age of 19. He then returned to Santa Barbara about ten years later making him around 30. In this story, I have Shawn working is Psych for 10 years and he has now been missing for another 10. This will make Shawn around the age of 50 for this story. Sorry to anyone I have confused because of this.**

**Chapter 3:**** The Note**

Lassiter couldn't believe his eyes. Was this person real? Who was he and why did he have this strange feeling that he knows him. In fact, if it wasn't for the face, he could have sworn that it was Shawn standing there. He had the same hair, the same build and height; hell, he was even wearing the same type of clothing Shawn liked including an Apple Jacks T-shirt.

Lassiter watched as the man moved slowly behind another man that was dressed in a long brown trench coat. The face gave him a sad smile and like the sadness in the eyes, Lassiter felt that the smile didn't belong there.

Suddenly the man looked at the man in the trench coat and then started to walk away. Not thinking, Lassiter shouted out and pointed towards the two men.

"Stop that man!" but now he was only pointing at the man in the trench coat, who looked up at him in surprise.

As the officers, including O'Hara, obeyed their detective, the man in the trench coat started running. But Lassiter took no notice, he was too busy trying to find the other man, who finally appeared from behind a tree, waved and then disappeared again.

By the time Lassiter's brain caught up to what was happening, the man in the trench coat had been handcuffed and was being put into a squad car.

"What happened?" Lassiter asked as Juliet approached him.

"Well...it looks like we got our killer."

"What do you mean?"

"The man you told us to stop. He's got what looks like the murder weapon on him," Juliet said holding up an evidence bag with a bloody hammer in it.

"But…I, I didn't mean him. I meant for you to stop the other guy."

"What other guy?"

"He…Oh well, at least we got a result. Come on, O'Hara; let's get back to the station."

By the end of the day, they had a confession from the trench coat man that he was the killer they were after. As Lassiter finished his paper work, McNab walked up to him and placed a cup of hot coffee on his desk. Looking up he saw that McNab also had an envelope in his hand.

"Thank you for the coffee, McNab."

"You're welcome sir, but I didn't get it for you. A young man brought in along with this note."

"Oh. Thank you, McNab," Lassiter said as he took the note.

Lassie stared at the note. He recognised the writing on it straight away. He had seen it enough. It was Spencer's writing. Looking at the coffee that came with the note, he saw it was the type of coffee that Spencer use to send him, even before they started dating.

Lassiter smiled at the drink. It was real Irish coffee, made with real Irish whiskey and Shawn had always sent it to him at the end of his shift so he could drink it. He looked back up at McNab.

"Who brought it in?" He figured that if it had been Shawn, there would have been a commotion. He watched as McNab suddenly went frigid "Well, McNab, who brought it in?"

"Sir, at first I thought it was...I mean, I saw him from behind and he was wearing..."

"McNab, just spit it out."

"I thought it was Shawn Spencer at first. That was until he turned around. The funny thing is. I'm sure I've seen him somewhere before."

"Maybe...at a crime scene?" Lassiter suggested.

"No...wait, yes, yes, he was at the last three crime scenes."

Lassiter let out the breath he was holding. So he wasn't going mad, he really had seen him.

"Is he still here?"

"No, he left as soon as he gave me the note and the coffee."

"Ok, thanks, McNab."

After McNab left, Lassiter quickly finished off his paper work and then headed off home. Once there he heated up the coffee in the microwave and sat down to read the note. His hand shook as he carefully removed the piece of paper that was within the envelope. Slowly opening it, Lassiter couldn't believe what he was reading.

'_Dear Carlton Lassiter, my darling Lassie. _

_God how I have missed you and it was amazing to see you again. _

_Thank you. _

_Thank you so much for restoring some, if only a little, of my faith in people. _

_I wish we could talk face to face, but that isn't possible…not anymore, anyway. _

_You were right, Lassie. I didn't just leave. I was taken and held against my will for over two years. I won't, can't, go into what they did to me, but let's just say that it has changed me forever. It has changed me in so many ways that you will never understand and part of it was because I thought no one was looking for me, that no one cared, but I was wrong. _

_I found out that you had been looking for me and that you are still looking. Well, Lassie, it's time for you to stop looking for me and time for you to start living again. _

_I love you and I always will, but you will not be able love the man I have become. _

_Please, Lassie, stop looking for me and find yourself a new love. _

_P.S. Please let my Dad and Gus know that I do understand why they didn't look for me, but it still hurts that they thought I could be that irresponsible. _

_From the one who will always love you, _

_Your fake psychic,_

_Shawn H. Spencer.' _

Lassiter couldn't believe it. He was right, Shawn hadn't just left; he was taken from them. It broke his heart that Shawn thought that he would care about how much he had changed. He loves Shawn and no matter what...he always will, but he needed to talk to Shawn face to face.

At first, looking over the letter again, he couldn't see anything to tell him where Shawn could be. That was until he turned the page over and there on the back was the name and address of a hotel in Santa Barbara.

Grabbing his coat, Lassiter walked out of his front door, hoping that he wasn't too late and that Shawn was still there.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	4. Two Loves Reunite

**Chapter 4:**** Two Loves Reunite**

Lassiter walked quickly into the Plaza Hotel's foyer and made a beeline for the check-in counter and the young woman behind it.

"Excuse me, miss," Lassiter said to get her attention.

"Yes sir, how can I help you?"

"I was wondering if there was a man by the name of Shawn Spencer registered here."

"I'm sorry sir, but we can't give out that type of information."

"I need to know, right now, if he is here," Lassiter said as he held up his badge.

"Just one moment sir."

Lassiter watched as she talked onto the phone and a few minutes later, a man he assumed was the manager walked up.

"Is there a problem here?"

"Yes, I'm Detective Lassiter and I am looking for a man by the name of Shawn Spencer, I believe he is staying here." Lassiter said holding up his badge again.

The manager looked at it and then nodded his head. Lassiter then watched, as the young lady typed what he assumed was Shawn's name into the computer in front of her. After a minute she nodded her head.

"Yes, we have a Shawn Spencer staying with us."

"What room is he in and do you know if he's in at the moment?"

She typed a little bit more in the computer, waited for a second before answering.

"He is…in and Mr. Spencer is in room 202." She then looked over to her manager.

"Would you like a key?" The manager asked Lassiter, who seemed to be thinking about something.

"Yes, please and...thank you."

"You're welcome, Detective, and I wonder if I could ask if you to..."

"Don't worry, I won't disturb the rest of your guests," and with that, Lassiter took the room key and headed off towards the elevators.

As the elevator door shut, Lassiter got loss in his thoughts. _'If Shawn was back, then why all the mystery, why not just come and tell him that he didn't want to be with him or was it...yes, that could explain the 'other' man. Why it was 'him' at the crime scenes and it was 'him' who brought the note. The other man wasn't another man, it was Shawn. After all didn't he say that he had changed and that he wanted to see him face to face but that wasn't possible anymore? Had the people who had taken Shawn done that much damage to him, that Shawn had to change the way his face looked?'_ Lassiter was brought out of his thoughts as the doors of the elevator opened.

Stepping out of the elevator, Lassiter made his way to room 202. He wasn't sure if he should knock or just walk in. As he stood there thinking, the door opened slightly.

"You came all this way, than you should come in."

It was Shawn's voice, that, he was sure of, but...it didn't have the laughter or Shawn's smile in it. Instead the voice was flat, empty and void of any emotions. Entering, Lassie found the lights were turned down low but he could see a shadowy figure standing near the windows. Lassiter turned and closed the door before moving further into the room, the figure didn't move.

"Don't come any closer," The man said and Lassiter obeyed and stopped where he was.

"Shawn...?" Lassiter hesitantly asked.

"Yes, Carlton, it's me."

"Thank god, I've been..."

"I know that you've been looking for me ever since I disappeared and I want you to know that you can stop looking and walk away. Just walk away, Carlton."

"I can't!"

"Yes, you can. I'm no longer the person you once knew, the person that you once loved. I've changed, changed in so many ways that I've even lost myself within the pain and hurt that I feel."

"Then let me help you find your way back. I don't care that you don't look the same way; that you have a new face, but I do know that what really made you, you, is still there. It just needs a light to guide it out again and I want to be that light."

Lassiter watched as Shawn turned around and looked at him. He was right, Shawn and the man that he had been seeing, were the same person.

"No! No, you don't. You don't want to be that light. You don't want to be that person who has to break through the darkness of pain and anger that is now me. It's not just my face that has changed, Carlton. I have changed as a person as well. I'm not that immature, happy go lucky, person anymore. I have trust issues, because I was kidnapped by someone I trusted and the fact that no one was looking for me and..."

"I was looking for you," Lassiter said as he took a few step forward, but he stopped when he saw Shawn flinch a little. "Shawn...I was looking for you. I never stopped."

"I know that, but you were the only one." Lassiter couldn't argue with that, because it was the truth.

Henry and Guster hadn't looked for Shawn; they had just thought that he had left like all the times before.

"It's not just the trust either. I, I'm lost, Lassie. I have so much anger and pain inside of me and..."

"And if you let me, I will be by your side every step of the way."

Shawn raised his head to look at Lassiter. Lassiter finally took this chance to catch Shawn's eyes with his. They were still Shawn's eyes. The same eyes that he had fallen in love with, but they were broken and it broke Lassiter's heart to see so much pain and sadness within them.

Keeping eye contact, Lassiter walked over to Shawn. It was only when their lips meet that either of them closed their eyes. The kiss was soft and tender, but full of the love they had for the other.

When they broke apart, Shawn was crying, so Lassiter pulled him into a hug. They stood there, Lassiter holding onto the man he loved and thought that he had lost for ever and Shawn, holding on tight to the man who had looked for him. They just stood there, holding each other for a long time as they took in the comfort from the closeness of the other.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	5. The Next Morning

**Chapter 5:**** The Next Morning**

Lassiter didn't know how long they had been standing there, how long he had been holding Shawn, but he didn't care. All he cared about was that he was holding the man he loved. Lassiter's arms were starting to get tired, but he knew that if he made the first move to let go that Shawn would think that he didn't really want him.

After a while Lassiter realised that Shawn was no longer crying, but was in fact asleep. Lifting him up, Lassiter carefully carried Shawn to the bedroom and placed him on the bed. After taking Shawn's shoes off and covering him with the sheet, Lassiter walked around to the other side of the bed and removed his shoes and gun, laid them on the bedside table and then made himself comfortable in the bed beside Shawn. As the younger man moved closer to his body, Lassiter sent off a text.

'_Chief, I don't know if I will be in tomorrow, but if I do, I will be late. I will explain when I see you, Lassiter.' _

He then hit the send button. Lassiter turned off his phone and put it next to his gun. Pulling Shawn in as close as he could, Lassiter breathed in the mixture of old spice aftershave and pineapple, the scent of Spencer, his Shawn. Lassiter drifted off to sleep with the thoughts of how something's never change.

The next morning, Lassiter woke up to an empty bed. Sitting up he looked around to find Shawn sitting in a nearby chair, watching him. The sadness was still in his eyes, but so was the little flicker of love.

"How long have you been awake?"

"A few hours…I put your gun in the bedside drawer just in case room service came in."

Lassiter looked to where he had put his gun the night before and for sure, it was gone, only his phone was there.

"Thank you, look I..."

"No, thank you," Shawn said as he looked down at the drink in his hand.

"What for?" Lassiter asked confused.

"For staying with me, it was the first time in ten years I've actually slept without having a nightmare."

"Same here Shawn. I kept having a recurring dream of us having our anniversary dinner. You got up and told me to find you and then you opened the door and there was a black hole on the other side. As you disappeared, you kept calling out to me, begging me, to find you."

"I'm sorry that you had to go through all of that."

"It doesn't matter anymore; I know you are safe now, and thank you, too."

Shawn tilted his he slightly and stared at Lassiter with curiosity in his eyes.

"Why?"

"Because you stayed as well, you could have left when you woke up, but you didn't."

"I was going to leave. Had my bags packed and everything, but...when I saw you lying there, I couldn't, I just couldn't leave without saying goodbye."

"I don't want you to leave again."

"I can't stay, no one will accept me; accept that I'm Shawn Spencer. Not looking like this."

"I accept you, Shawn and I'm sure the others will too."

"No! You can't say that. You can't tell me what they will think or that they will accept me!" Shawn yelled at Lassiter, anger burning in his eyes.

"Shawn, please! It hurts me to see you hurting like this, but please, at least…at least give me…us, a chance, Shawn."

"Why, so I can hurt you, too? You just don't understand. I may have come a long way over the last few years, but I..."

But you have an even longer way to go."

"Yes."

"Then let me walk that path with you. Let me be the one you can lean on when you need to and if you need to have me carry you part of the way, I will."

Shawn raised his head and looked straight into Lassiter's eyes. He could see the hurt, the pain and the anger within, but what he could see the most of all was the love Lassie had for him and the determination to help him. Letting out a sigh, Shawn nodded his head as he knew that he had lost the fight with Lassie. But unlike the other fights he had lost lately, at least with this one there was a chance that he would still end up with the prize, namely Lassie.

"Ok, but where do I, we, start?"

"Sitting down, talking and working out what we both want at the moment would be a good place and Shawn…"

"Yes, Carlton?"

"Is there any chance I could get something to eat, I'm starving."

"Sure, I'll ring for room service. What about work?"

"I sent a text to the Chief last night telling her that I would either be late or not in at all."

"Oh, so you planned this then." Shawn laughed.

Lassiter just stared at him. Here was the man of his dreams, the man that at one point, thought he would never see again, standing in front of him, laughing. But as Shawn turned around and, even though he is still laughing, Lassiter could still see the sadness in his eyes.

It was going to be a long journey for both of them. There are going to be parts where they will fly through and then there will be other spots where they will stumble and fall. They might even go backwards at some points, but he will be there to catch Shawn and help him move forward. He WAS going to be Shawn's candle in the window and he will burn as bright as he could, no matter how dark it got.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	6. The Truth Comes Out

**Author's Note:**** Due to family comment at the moment, posting of chapters may be delayed for a few week. I will update as soon as I can. Sorry!**

**Chapter 6:**** The Truth Comes Out**

After Shawn had agreed that they did needed to talk, they sat down, Shawn on a chair and Lassiter on the couch. They sat there for a while in silence before Lassiter decided to start the ball rolling. At first, Lassiter gave a little huff of laughter as a smile worked its way onto his face.

"You know, I think this is the quietest you have ever been." Lassiter watched as a small smile followed by a hint of laughter formed in Shawn's eyes along with a hint of red on his cheeks. This was followed by Shawn's lowering his head slightly and biting his lower lip. "See, Shawn, I can still make you smile and I know that somewhere deep inside, is the old you. It is just hiding because it is scared that if it comes out again, it's going to get hurt, but I won't let it."

"But what if only part of the old me returns? Can you love only part of me?"

"Shawn, I love you! Even if you don't look the same and even if you have changed inside, I love you, I always have and I always will." Lassiter was starting to get a little frustrated with having to repeat himself, but if saying it over and over is going to be the only way to get through to Shawn then he is willing to say it forever.

"You say that now, but as time goes by, you will change your mind."

"It hasn't changed over the last ten years, Shawn."

"True, Lassie, but that was hope pushing you on. Now that you know the truth...it will be different."

"No, it won't be. All you need to do is believe in our love."

"I know that, but it's just not that easy, not after what I've been through."

"And when you're ready, I want you to tell me all about it, but as for now, I know you are going to think that I'm pushing things, but I take it you don't have much money."

"No, I don't, why?"

"Because I want you to come back and stay at my place with me."

"What!"

"You can stay in the spare room. That way, we can talk and I can keep an eye on you. I'm not expecting anything from you; this is just so that you have a stable place to stay."

"Do I have a choice in this?"

"Of course you do, do you really think I would force you into doing anything, Shawn?"

"Ok, but on one condition."

"And that is?"

"You make the offer again..." Shawn quickly put up his hand to stop Lassiter from talking. "As I was saying, I want you to make the offer again if you still want me after I tell you what I've been through."

"Are you sure that you are ready to tell me?"

"Yes, Carlton, I don't think I will be any more ready than I am now."

Lassiter nodded and watched as Shawn shifted slightly in his seat.

"Well…do you remember Officer Tony Trump?"

"Yes, I think I remember him, he was a good officer. Actually, after you disappeared, he asked me out, but I told him no. Why do you ask about him?"

"Because he wanted you, Carlton, and that is why he gave me to the ones that did this to me."

"I'm so sorry, Shawn, I didn't know."

"I know that. I had heard that Trump had already left Santa Barbara by the time they arrested him. Anyway, he was at my place when I got home that night; him and one of his friends, but I only saw Trump. The other man walked up behind me and while Trump kept my attention, the other one hit me on the head."

Lassiter watched Shawn flinch a little as he said the last bit.

"When I woke up, I was tied up and in some sort of crate. When we got where ever it was that they were taking me, they sprayed something into the crate and it knocked me out again. The next time I came to, I was chained to a wall in a cell that only had a bed and a toilet in it. From that day on, the only time I was taken out of the cell was when they took me to a room where I was drugged and raped at least three times a day.

"Shawn…"

"Please, let me finish."

Lassiter would have stopped Shawn there and then, but he could see in Shawn's sad eyes he needed to do this.

"Ok."

"After three weeks of it, I stopped fighting and just let them do what they wanted to do with me. In the end, I lost all track of time and then one day they just took me out and said that I was no good to them anymore and they started to beat me. I don't know how long the beating lasted, but I'm sure they kept on going even after I had lost consciousness. When the police found me, they thought that I was dead, but somehow I let them know that I wasn't."

Shawn suddenly went quiet. Lassiter could see that he was thinking. Then, just as suddenly, he started talking again.

"Most of what happened after that is still a blur, but I knew I was in a lot of pain. The doctors had kept me in a drug induced coma for months. During that time, the doctors treated my injuries and repaired my broken bones. When I woke up, I could finally tell them who I was and that is when I found out no one was, or had, been looking for me."

"I was looking for you," Lassiter whispered to himself, but he could see by the way Shawn moved his head, he heard him too.

"From there on, I was no longer fighting for my life, I was fighting to recover, to prove to myself that I could beat this. I've been through so many psychologists and theorists over the years that I've lost count. They were trying to treat me for my depression and the fact that I had tried to kill myself a few times."

"I spent a year having plastic surgery and I still need to go back for more. One of my therapists suggested that I come back to Santa Barbara to see and if I could talk to you all. I have the police and doctor's reports to prove who I am, if you want to see them."

"I might look at them later, Shawn. I am so sorry that you had to go through all of this on your own, but now that has changed, you are not on your own anymore. I'm here for you and the offer is still there. I want you to move into my place so I can help you in any way you want me to help." Lassiter watched as Shawn smiled at him.

"Ok, I'll move in with you, Carlton."

"Good, now let's go and pack your bags, pay your hotel bill and then go home. And, Shawn…"

"Yes, Carlton?"

"I think you need to ring your Dad and Guster, just to let them know you're ok."

"I know and...I will, I promise."

With that they packed Shawn's only bag, Lassiter paid the hotel bill and they walked out of the hotel together.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	7. Home at Last

**Chapter 7:**** Home at Last**

When they arrived at Lassiter's, Shawn was honestly surprised to find that Lassiter still lived in the same house that Dimmer was going to kill them in.

Lassiter smiled at the cute expression that Shawn's new face was making. It was like an expression of a child that was full of wonder.

"Come on," Lassiter said as he carried Shawn's bag up the path leading to his front door.

Shawn followed Lassiter up the path, up the stairs and through the door that he held open for him and then into the house. Whereas the outside of the house had stayed the same, Shawn couldn't say the same for the inside of it. Man, how the house had changed.

Lassiter now had pictures on the wall of both himself and of Shawn, and his crime board was no longer full of crime scene photos, rather it was full of tips and leads as to where Shawn could be. In other words, Lassie had the last ten years of his life, summed up in one small board.

"Sorry, I'll get rid of that..." Lassiter said as he made his way towards the board.

"You don't have too. Man, there are so many times on this board that you could have found me if you had known that I didn't look the same."

"Really?" Lassiter asked as he watched Shawn move closer to the board.

"Yes, I didn't know you were looking for me at the time, and I actually saw you a few times." He traced his fingers over some to the places that had been listed. Shawn then looked away from the board and looked at Lassiter with such sad eyes. "Did Dad ever say anything about me?"

"I'm sorry, Shawn; I don't understand what you mean? He did go off his head about you taking off and being irresponsible, and at me for not wanting to stop looking for you. Is that what you mean?"

"Don't worry. If he had said anything, you would have known what I was talking about and you wouldn't have been looking for me all these years either."

"Shawn..." Lassiter said giving Shawn's shoulder a gentle squeeze. "No matter what you are hiding, it's not going to stop me from loving you. Even if it turns out that you're not a psychic, I will never stop loving you and I will always be by your side." Lassiter finished off by giving Shawn's shoulder another squeeze.

"You say that now and, and I really do want to believe you, but...but you know just as well as I do, things change. I have changed and you have changed over the last ten years. You can't deny that. You just can't."

You're right, we both have changed, but everyone changes, Shawn, and to be honest we will always keep on changing, it doesn't mean I will stop loving you or you from loving me."

Shawn lets out a small laugh.

"What?"

"Love…you said love."

"So?"

Shawn looked up into Lassiter eyes. "I know that you love me, but it just might not be enough to save us…to save me."

"You might be right, it might not be enough, but if we don't at least try to fight for us, for what we had, to give us a chance, then yes, it is too late for us to start again, but I'm hoping that you are willing to at least give it a try. After all, you didn't just pack up and leave after you delivered the note and coffee."

"No, I didn't and to tell you the truth, I have been in Santa Barbara for nearly two weeks."

"You have?"

"Yes, I was only going to drop off the note and go, but something made me stay."

"What?"

"Mainly you, but there were other things as well, like the couple of cases I had helped in and…"

"A couple of cases?"

"I phoned in a few tips," Shawn said smiling as he remembered that it was him phoning in tips that had led him to meeting Lassiter in the first place.

"Shawn…" Lassiter said as he too remembered that faithful day. "Come on, I will put your bag in the spare room and you can go and put on the kettle."

"What, you still don't have a coffee maker yet?" Shawn said with a smile.

Lassiter looked at him. It was the first genuine smile Shawn had given him since yesterday, but it still wasn't his smile. There was still sadness in those eyes of his and the smile itself didn't reach the sky like the old Shawn's always did.

Lassiter walked into the spare room and placed Shawn's bag on the bed. Looking at the unmade bed, he picked up the bag again and placed it on the desk nearby. He then proceeded to get the linen out and make the bed. After he finished, he turn around to find Shawn standing at the door watching him.

"Sorry, I couldn't just leave the bed unmade."

"No worries, the kettle should be boiling in a minute."

"I'm coming," Lassiter said as he took one more glance at the bed.

He and Shawn then walked back into the lounge and as Shawn sat down, the kettle started to whistle and Lassiter went to make the drinks, only to stop in his tracks.

"What would you like to drink?"

"Coffee, black," Shawn said as he started at Lassiter.

"Right! Just how you always had it; just straight black coffee."

"That's right, do you still have yours the same way?"

"No, I actually only have two sugars and one cream now days."

"Good for you," Shawn said as he had another look around.

"Well, Shawn, now that you are home we will need to get to know each other again."

When he returned to the lounge with the coffees, he was surprised to see Shawn looking straight at him with a shocked look and fear in his eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"You said…you said, now that I'm home and…"

"Oh god, Shawn, I'm sorry." Lassiter said as he put the coffees down. He wanted to go over and just give Shawn a hug and apologise for what he had said. "I just meant that, that now you're here, as in Santa Barbara, that we would have to learn how each of us had changed."

"It's ok; I like the idea of home. It's been such a long time since I've had a place I can call my own, to call home that I really believed that I wouldn't have one ever again."

"So then, let's drink our first cup of coffee to us and to you finally coming home."

"Yes, I think I am; I am truly home again."

With that they sat down and raised their coffee cups and hit them together with a soft clink.

"Welcome Home, Shawn!"

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	8. Ten Years in Two Hours

**Chapter 8:**** Ten Years in Two Hours**

Lassiter and Shawn sat there in the lounge room for the next two hours, drinking coffee and talking. At first it was Shawn who did all of the talking while Lassiter listened.

Shawn skimmed over the first couple of years he was away. He wasn't really ready to go into too much detail with what had happened to him. Shawn also couldn't really remember too much between the beating, when he was rescued and when he had woken up from the drug induced coma that the doctor's had kept him in for nearly six months.

Lassiter watched in fascination as Shawn talked about the nurses and doctors that were helping him to recover. And he felt Shawn's pain as he talked about the surgeries he went through as they tried to repair his face. The struggle Shawn had as he was counselled, trying to help him get over what had happen and Lassiter's heart broke as Shawn's face fell, when he spoke about being told that there had never been an official report about him being missing. Lassiter could see the tears Shawn was holding back when he mentioned the pain he felt when he was told no one was looking for him.

Shawn then went on and spoke about the fight he had to prove he was who he claimed to be and then the fight he had with the world. He tried hard to explain to Lassiter how he had to learn how to live in a world he no longer understood or trusted. To try and make ends meet Shawn explained that he had gone back to some of his old habits of ringing in tips to the police and fallen back on some of the skills he had picked up over the years.

Slowly but surely, Shawn ended up paying back all the money he owed and started paying for his own way. And over the years he made his way back to Santa Barbara and somehow, back home to Lassie.

When Shawn finished it was his time to listen as Lassiter filled him in on what had been happening to everyone else over the last ten years.

Lassiter had explained how, when Shawn had first disappeared, there had been a search for him. There were fears that he had been in some sort of an accident and another one was that he had been taken because of a case he had been working on.

Of course Henry and Gus were sure that Shawn had just left to have a break and that he would contact them when he was ready, which was usually with-in two to three weeks. But as the weeks turned into months and there wasn't any news, the search had started up again, but they still found nothing.

After two months, Henry and Gus had packed up all of Shawn's stuff in his apartment and his bike and had moved it to the shed at the back of Henry's place. It was another two months before Gus closed down Psych for good.

It was now that Lassiter explained that a few weeks after that he thought he had found him and he had busted into Henry's house to see if it Henry could help him. Instead he and Henry had gotten into an argument about his obsession to find Shawn. It was here that Lassiter went quiet for a few moments and Shawn started to worry, but when Lassiter raised his head, Shawn could see hope in Lassie's eyes.

Lassiter went on to explain that it was out of anger that no one was looking for him except for Lassiter himself and the fact that he was so frustrated that he kept coming up empty handed, he told Henry off. Smiling to himself, Lassiter told Shawn that he told Henry that he was a bad father and was most likely a bad cop. That he couldn't understand how he could let Shawn leave like he had in the past and not look for him. And that couldn't he see that this was not just a typical leaving, after all Shawn had left behind his bike and everything he owned. Had Shawn ever done that before, the answer was No!

But when Henry said that Shawn was irresponsible, heartless and only cared about himself, that was the final straw and Lassiter let Henry know that and when Henry asked him why he even cared, Lassiter had let the so called 'cat' out of the bag. He had told Henry about their relationship and the fact that they were just about to move in together.

Lassiter stopped there and waited to see what Shawn was going to say about that. But all he wanted to know is what did his dad say.

Smiling Lassiter told him that firstly Henry kicked him out of the house, but a few days later he apologised to him and they made their peace. Hell, Henry even accepted that they had been in a relationship and that the thought of moving in together might have been the reason Shawn had left. But in all he now understood why Lassiter wanted to find Shawn and he tried to support him.

Lassiter then told Shawn how over the years Gus and Juliet had fallen in love, married and now have two children. McNab and his wife have three and unfortunately for the chief, her husband and daughter were killed in a car accident a few years back.

Also over the years the others had found out about their relationship and all have been accepting and supportive of him.

Lassiter watched as Shawn processed all that he had been told. He watched as Shawn's face moved and changed with the emotions that came to him and he realised something.

This was Shawn, even with the different looking face. Shawn still had the same glimmer in his eyes and the same expressions. He was his Shawn and he loved him even more. Over the last ten years, Lassiter couldn't deny that he didn't question how much he had...did...love Shawn. Hell, he even questioned that before all this had happened, whether or not it was Shawn or how Shawn looked that he was attracted to, but now, now he knew it was Shawn he truly loved, no matter what he looked like.

Lassiter watched as Shawn let out a yawn, it had been a tiring day for them both, especially an emotional one. So while Shawn was going to lie down and have a nap, Lassiter said he would duck out and do some shopping.

Before leaving, Lassiter checked on Shawn. He was asleep, a restless sleep, but asleep never the less. Lassiter looked at Shawn's sleeping face. It was soft and a bit paler than it used to be and it seemed to make Shawn look a lot younger than he really is. But no matter what, you couldn't see the scars from the plastic surgery and for some reason, it just seem to suit Shawn.

Walking out of the bedroom Lassiter hoped he can get to the shops and back before Shawn wakes. Lassiter made sure that he put pineapples on his list and with that he was gone.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	9. Going to the Shops

**Chapter 9:**** Going to the Shops**

Lassiter made his way down the isle of the small shop five minutes from his place. He was worried that if he took too long Shawn would be gone.

He made his way picking up everything from milk and bread to pineapple juice and fruit. Just as he arrived at the register and started placing his stuff on the counter, two men walked in. At first he took no notice of them, that was until out of the corner of his eye, he saw one of the men pull a gun.

The men came walking up to the register shouting and pointing their guns at him and the young girl behind the counter. Lassiter had no time for them; he had no time to be shot either. If he didn't get back home soon, Shawn would be awake and he might take this chance to disappear again.

So…Lassiter didn't waste any time, he pulled out his gun and identified himself as a police officer. So as soon as the first one moved to shoot him, he was ready and brought him down with one shot. The second man just dropped his gun, and then himself, onto the ground in surrender.

After putting handcuffs on both suspects, Lassiter stood there waiting, hoping that an officer would be there soon. He really didn't want to stay there. All Lassiter could think about was that he needed to get back to Shawn. When he saw McNab and O'Hara climb out of the squad car, he let out a small groan knowing full well that O'Hara would want to know why he wasn't at work today.

As soon as Juliet climbed out of the squad car she spied Lassiter standing over two men that were handcuffed and on the ground. One was bleeding and being attended to by the ambulance crew. Lassiter looked like he wanted to leave, like he had somewhere else to be.

The Chief hadn't said much as to why Lassiter wasn't at work today, only that he was taking a 'personal' day and for Lassiter, that meant he had another lead on Shawn. Smiling, Juliet hoped that maybe, just maybe, he might actually find Shawn. Shaking her head Juliet hoped that this wouldn't be another false lead like they have been all these years. Walking over to Lassiter, McNab and the uninjured suspect, Juliet wondered, like many times before, if they would ever find Shawn.

"Detective Lassiter," Juliet said nodding her head.

"Detective O'Hara."

"So can you tell us what happened?"

"I was here buying some food and those two men came in and tried to rob the store. I identified myself as a police officer and when one of them pulled a gun on me I fire mine and the other one just lay down and surrendered."

"I will need your gun since it was fired," Juliet said eyeing Lassiter off.

Juliet knew that Lassiter hated handing over his gun, so when he did without any trouble, Juliet was worried.

After the two men were in custody, one off to the hospital and the other to lockup, Juliet gave Lassiter another look over. He was standing there next to his car and the shop owner had given him his groceries but he looked…different. There was something that she hadn't seen in him for years. Lassiter looked…happy.

Was he happy because he could go? Maybe, but that wouldn't be all! As Juliet got closer, she could see what he had in his shopping and it gave her hope. There were items that had pineapple in them. Had Lassiter found Shawn? Was Shawn back and he didn't want to let her know just yet? Whatever it was, Lassiter seemed to be the better for it. As he looked at her, Juliet smiled, which seemed to put a frown on his face.

"Can I help you, O'Hara?"

"I just wanted to make sure you were ok."

"I'm fine, I just want to get home, I…"

"Yes, Lassiter?"

"I have a friend staying at my place that I haven't seen for a while."

"That's nice; do I know who it is?" Juliet watched as Lassiter glanced down at his shopping and then back to her. She could see that he seemed to be trying to make up his mind about something.

"You've met before, but…they're not sure if they will be staying long or not."

"Well then, if you get the chance, you will have to bring…your friend…to the station so we can see them again."

"I will if I get the chance, but as I said, they're not sure if they will be staying or leaving. Can I go?" Lassiter said looking at his car.

"Sure, I'll call you if we need to ask you anything else."

Juliet watched as Lassiter put his shopping into the car and then climbed in. As he drove off she hoped whoever was visiting him was who she thought it was and that he would stay. Juliet waved goodbye and then headed back to McNab for them to go back to the station and fill in the paper work.

Lassiter watched Juliet's waving form shrink in his rear-view mirror. She was a lovely girl, kind, strong and a good friend. She had gotten to know him so well, that she knew when not to push him. But now, all he wanted to do was to get back to Shawn and that was just what he was going to do.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	10. Let a Sleeping Shawn Lie

**Chapter 10:**** Let a Sleeping Shawn Lie.**

Lassiter walked back into his house, closing the door behind him. He then quickly made his way to the kitchen, put the shopping away and then headed towards the spare room to check on Shawn.

When he first looked through the door, Shawn was sleeping quietly. As he took in the sight before him, Lassiter couldn't help but wonder if he would be able to get through to Shawn, if he will be able to get him to believe that he still loved him and that he is now safe.

Looking at the clock, Lassiter could see that Shawn had been asleep for about two hours. He wanted to let Shawn sleep, since he looked like he needed it, but Shawn had said he needed to take his medication at three, so he decided to wake him.

Leaning over Shawn's sleeping form Lassiter gave Shawn's shoulder a gentle shake as he called out his name. Lassiter was expecting Shawn to awake with a start; after all, with what Shawn had been through, he wouldn't expect anything different. But what he wasn't expecting was Shawn to come up fighting and fighting he certainly did.

At first Shawn swung his elbow straight into Lassiter's chest with all his might. As Lassiter stumbled back Shawn had swung himself around and was now standing and before Lassiter could say anything, Shawn had planted a good right fist to his face, sending Lassiter flying into the wall. Collapsing onto the floor, Lassiter tried to nurse his chest and jaw, but when his eyes caught the glimpse of a metal blade, he knew he had to get through to Shawn before it was too late.

"Shawn," Lassiter screamed in desperation. "It's me, Carlton…No! It's Lassie, it's me Lassie."

Lassiter watched as Shawn stopped, his face just inches from his own. Swallowing, Lassiter could feel the cold blade as Shawn placed it against his neck.

"S…Shawn, please, it's me Lassie," Lassiter pleaded. Tears ran down his face as he realised that he might die at Shawn's hands.

It didn't seem real. He had searched for Shawn for so long and now that he has finally found him, Shawn was holding a knife at his throat and could easy take his life.

"Shawn, please don't do this! I…I love you."

That seemed to do it. Shawn started to blink. His eyes changed from a glazed over stare to confusion then to fear.

"Oh. God, Lassie. I'm so sorry." Shawn moved away, dropping the knife onto the floor as he did. Shawn backed up into a corner, sank to the floor and then tried to curl himself up in to a ball.

"Shawn, it's…ok, it's alright," Lassiter whispered as he crawled over to him. "I understand, I really do and it was my fault, not yours," he whispered as he pulled Shawn into an awkward hug.

But, I hurt you and…"

"Shawn, please don't. After all you've been through, I…I should have expected you to react that way when I woke you up. I'm just glad that…I mean…I'm sorry, I should have known better."

Both men stayed that way for about half an hour, before Shawn started to feel a cramp creeping into his legs. Breaking apart they both moved into more comfortable positions and then Shawn looked over Lassiter's face. Lassiter was now sporting a nice big bruise on his chin and where he had held the knife there was a thin red mark with a little trail of dried blood coming from it where it had cut the skin.

Lassiter watched as Shawn looked him over and he couldn't help but flinch a little when Shawn reached out and touched where he had held the knife. Shawn then brought his hand up and ran his finger's over Lassiter's chin and again Lassiter couldn't help but flinch as a pain shot through his jaw.

Lassiter could see the pain, hurt and guilt that Shawn had in his eyes and as those eyes met his, Lassiter could see the tears that wanted to fall.

"It's ok, Shawn, just let it go."

And Shawn did. He let go of the tears he was fighting to hold back and as he lent into Lassiter's embrace he allowed Lassiter to hold him in a way he never thought he would let a man or woman to ever hold him again.

Lassiter sat there holding Shawn, letting him cry into his shoulder. This was the second time in less than two days he had held Shawn as he cried and Lassiter was starting to feel guilty. He was feeling guilty about how good it felt to hold Shawn again, especially since it was because he was hurting.

After a while, Shawn finally calmed down and he sat back a little. Lassiter watched as a light blush formed on Shawn's new pale face and it seemed to give off a light glow. Lassiter knew he would be making Shawn blush more just to see that sweet and innocent look which was a mixture with the look of embarrassment in Shawn's eyes. Seeing the streaks that the tears made, Lassiter decided that they needed to clean Shawn up.

"Come on, let's go and wash your face, it will make you feel better. Then we will have something to eat and you can have your medication."

"Sound good to me and, Carlton…"

"Yes Shawn."

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For being there for me." Shawn placed a hand behind Lassiter's head and pulled him into a tender, yet long kiss.

When they broke apart, Lassiter could see in Shawn's eyes that he no longer had anything to worry about. Shawn wasn't going anywhere.

Shawn, on the other hand, finally allowed himself to trust someone else again and he was so glad that it was Lassiter.

After Shawn had washed up and they had treated Lassiter's bruise and cut, they made their way into the kitchen. While Lassiter got them something to eat and drink, Shawn took his medication. They then made their way to the couch where they sat and ate and talked a little more, where Lassiter brought up the topic of Shawn calling his dad and Gus.

So after they had talked and cleaned up, Shawn picked up the phone and dialled his dad's number.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	11. Henry and Gus Receive a Call

**Chapter 11:**** Henry and Gus Receive a Call**

Henry Spencer was sitting in his lounge chair watching the TV. Actually he wasn't really watching it. He was babysitting for Gus and Juliet and he had some cartoons on for the kids. Looking over to the clock he saw that it was getting onto four and he would soon have to start dinner.

Knowing damn well that the kids won't move from in front of the TV, Henry made his way to the kitchen, but before he could open the fridge his phone rang. Looking down at the caller's ID, he saw that it was from an 'Unknown' caller. Henry was just about to hang up, when he had this funny feeling he needed to answer it.

Giving a quick glance at the kids to make sure they were still ok, he pressed the answer button.

"Henry Spencer speaking," Henry said he then waited for an answer, which for some reason never came.

"Listen…I don't have time to waste on some stupid…"

"Dad, it's me, Shawn."

Henry stopped speaking. He thought he had heard Shawn on the other end, but it was so quiet he wasn't sure that someone had even spoken.

"Sorry, what did you say?"

"It's…it's me, Dad."

"Shawn, oh thank god."

"You sound relieved to hear from me."

"What…of course I'm relieved to hear from you. I'm glad to know that you are ok, Shawn."

"Are you?"

"What type of question is that?"

Henry could hear the questioning in Shawn's voice and wasn't sure why, after all of these years, Shawn still questioned whether or not he cared. "Of course I am glad to hear from you. It's been ten years Shawn."

"I know, Dad. I know it's been ten years and I know that you didn't look for me."

"Shawn…"

"No, Dad, I get it, ok. I really do. I know I used to disappear all the time and that I never gave you a reason to believe that I didn't do it again this time, but I didn't."

"You didn't what…Shawn?"

"I didn't just up and leave this time. I was taken, kidnapped, and they hurt me badly, Dad. It's taken me all these years to be able to ring you since I was found, but I want you to know that I don't blame you or hate you."

"Oh, God, Shawn…can I see you."

"Even if I came around to see you; you wouldn't see me. I've changed; I've changed a lot. I'm not the same son you used to know. I'm not the same person anymore."

"I still want to see you."

"Maybe, maybe I will come to see you, but I need to…" Henry waited for Shawn to finish whatever he was saying. "I need to get some more help before I can come around to see you. Just know this, Dad, I'm safe now and that I don't blame you."

"Can we talk a little bit longer?"

"No! I mean…I need to call a few other people to let them know I'm ok and I will call you back another time."

"Ok, Shawn. Oh, Shawn, before you go."

"Yes, Dad?"

"I know about you and Lassiter and your relationship with him. You better make sure you ring him, if you know what I mean."

"Thank you, Dad, and I will. Bye."

With that Shawn hung up, he was left sad and confused. It must have been the first time he ever called his dad and they had actually talked without fighting, but he couldn't dwell on that right now because he needed to call Gus.

Burton Guster had just walked out of a very important meeting when his phone started vibrating. Taking it out of his pocket, he was surprised to see the caller ID coming up as 'Unknown'. Without hesitation Gus answered it, just in case it was a new client calling.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Burton Guster speaking. If you need the drugs, I've got them for you."

Gus listen as the sound of giggling came floating down the receiver. At first he thought it was just kids, but then something very familiar hit him and his annoyance changed to anger. He continued to head to his office.

"If that is you, Shawn, you better have a damn good excuse for disappearing for the last ten years."

As he entered his office, Gus listened as the giggling suddenly stopped and a dead silence was on the other side. Now Gus was sure that it was Shawn who had called him and he wasn't in any mood to be the butt of one of Shawn's pranks.

"That's it, Shawn, I've had it with you. I now have a great job, a loving wife and children, that is, if you are interested in hearing that I got on with my life after you left. I don't need to have you come waltzing back into my life, or Juliet's, who is now my wife, by the way."

"I'm glad to hear that your life is so much better without me in it, Gus." Gus was taken aback; he could actually hear the sadness in Shawn's voice. "I just rang up to let you know I'm still alive and that I understand why you didn't look for me. I won't bother you or your family anymore. But before I go, I just wanted to say I didn't just leave. I was kidnapped, but I'm starting to heal from what they did to me. Goodbye."

Gus just stood there in shock as he listened to the dial tone. Had Shawn really just said that he had been kidnapped? Oh God, he and Mr. Spencer had been such fools and now…now he may have just lost his best friend. Shaking his head, Gus quickly rang Henry Spencer's number. He needed to know if Shawn had contacted him and if he did, did Shawn leave his dad a contact number.

Lassiter had been sitting there the whole time, his arms around Shawn's shoulders for support. He was worried about Shawn after he had talked to Guster or rather, Shawn had listened a lot more that he had talked. After that phone call, Shawn looked tired.

"Do you want to ring Chief Vick or Juliet?"

"No…not Juliet. I told Gus I wouldn't bother his family and that's what Juliet is, Gus' family. I might just write Chief Vick a note."

"Ok…do you want to lie down for a while?

"Yes please and, Lassie…" Lassiter heard the hesitation in Shawn's voice. "Can you lay with me, please?"

"Of Course I can."

Lassiter and Shawn made their way into Lassiter's bedroom. Once there, Lassiter lay down on the bed he had once shared with Shawn and held out his hand. After a moment Shawn lay down next to him and was soon being held in his Lassie's arms on more. In the end they both fell asleep, content in being in each other's arms again.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	12. Lassie's Love has Saved Shawn

**Chapter 12:**** Lassie's Love has Saved Shawn**

The next morning found the lost lovers still in each other's arms.

Carlton didn't mind one bit. He had waited ten years for this day and it had finally happened. Shawn, his Shawn, was back in his arms and he wasn't going to let him go again.

Lassiter was so lost in his thoughts he hadn't realised that Shawn was awake and looking up at him. So when he looked down to see Shawn's eyes looking up at him, he was a little surprised and jumped a bit.

Shawn had taken this the wrong way and tried to pull himself from Lassiter's hold. But as soon as Lassiter realised what was happening, he held on longer.

"Shawn, I'm sorry."

"Let me go, just…let me go!" Shawn cried, but Lassiter wasn't going to give in.

"Shawn, please I'm…"

Just then Lassiter's alarm went off. It was time for him to get up and get ready for work, but he couldn't leave, not with Shawn like this. But because Lassiter was distracted by the alarm, Shawn had managed to get free and he bolted for the bathroom, locking the door behind him.

Lassiter couldn't believe how strong Shawn had become. He knew Shawn, even though it didn't look like there was much of him, was a strong person before, but now, now he was even stronger and that worried Lassiter. Before, Shawn was strong in both body and his mind, but now his body was even stronger but he was lacking the strength in his state of mind, and that could be dangerous, maybe even downright deadly.

Lassiter climbed out of bed and quickly got dressed. He would give Shawn a little space and before it was time to leave, he would reassess the situation and if he thought leaving Shawn alone wouldn't be a good thing he would just ring and tell the Chief he wasn't coming in again.

After he had started the coffee and looked in the fridge deciding what to have for breakfast, Lassiter made his way back to the bedroom and the bathroom to see if Shawn was ready to come out.

The door was still locked and there wasn't a noise that he could hear coming from behind the door. Suddenly, fear gripped Lassiter. What had Shawn said about trying to kill himself before? With one quick kick, Lassiter kicked the door in and he found Shawn sitting on the toilet, lid down, using it as a seat, but the shocked look on his face said it all.

"Lassie, your door!"

"I would rather a broken door than another broken heart."

"What?"

"I'm sorry. I…I remembered you saying something about you trying to take your life before and I…"

Lassiter watched as Shawn looked at the washbasin and he followed Shawn's eyes to the razor blade that was sitting there. When they looked back at each other, their eyes locked. Lassiter's was filled with worry, while Shawn had fear, sorrow and guilt in his.

"I'm sorry. I did think about it, but when I…" Shawn broke eye contact and looked down at the floor, "I remembered what you said about how you loved me and I just couldn't do it. I…" He looked back up into Lassiter's eyes, "I love you too much to leave you again."

Lassiter walked forward and then helped Shawn up off the toilet and kissed him, with the most tender, yet loving kiss he had ever given anyone. When they broke apart, they were both breathless and it took a little while for them to catch their breaths.

"Shawn, I'm not going to work again today. I don't think I should leave you right now."

"And what will happen tomorrow or the day after that. No, Lassie, you go. I'll be here when you get home." Shawn looked at the razor blade I know now that I don't want to die. I want to be here, be with you."

"Are you sure? I mean…it won't be any trouble if I stay home again."

Shawn placed his hand first on Lassiter's face and then he moved in to give Lassiter a hug, laying his head on Lassiter's chest. Lassiter just wrapped his arms around Shawn and breathed the scent that was Shawn Spencer.

"I love you, Lassie, and because of that and the fact that I know you love me, I want you to go. Go to work. Go and see if anyone asks about me. I'm sure they won't, but you never know."

"I'm sure they will. Even if it's just to find out if I had heard from you."

"So…you go?"

"Ok, I'll go, but first…we go and get some breakfast."

"You lead the way." Shawn said smiling.

They pulled apart, but Lassiter didn't let Shawn's hand go. So Shawn and Lassiter, hand in hand, made their way to the kitchen. Once there, Lassiter sat Shawn down as he dished up breakfast.

Shawn sat there staring at the food Lassiter had given him. There was bacon, two sausages, eggs and toast, a glass of pineapple juice and a mug of hot coffee.

Lassiter watched as Shawn pushed around his food eating very little. Finally, after Shawn had pushed the food around so it looked like a face, Lassiter had enough.

"Is everything ok with the food?"

When Shawn looked up at him, there were tears in his eyes, but Lassiter could also see that they weren't tears because Shawn was sad. No! He could see Shawn's eyes were smiling. They were the old Shawn's smiling eyes.

"I'm…I'm not used to eating this amount of food anymore." Seeing the confused look on Lassiter's face, Shawn explained a little bit more. "You see, when I was held, they didn't feed me much. What you have on my plate, would have been about what they had feed me in two weeks."

"I'm sorry, Shawn, I should have…"

"Don't," Shawn said as he placed his hand onto Lassiter's, "you didn't know and to be the truth, over the years, I've learnt to eat a lot more. It's just this is now a day's worth. So while you're at work, you won't have to worry about me being hungry because I have plenty to eat."

Lassiter let out a small chuckle. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course you can."

"Why were you crying?"

"Because…of you, because you have saved me, you and your love for me. I want to live again, Lassie, what happened in the bathroom proves that. I want to live. I want to be with you and I want to be me again."

"Shawn, are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I know now that with your love and support, I can and I will be me again, at least on the inside that is!"

"And I will be there all the way with you, but only if that is what you want."

"It is. Now you better finish eating and get going, otherwise you will be late for work."

"Yes dear."

Shawn and Lassiter had a bit of a laugh, finished off breakfast and as Lassiter walked out the door, Shawn gave him a kiss.

As Lassiter drove to work he couldn't help but think that everything was right again with the world.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	13. Operation, Find Shawn

**Chapter 13:**** Operation, Find Shawn**

Lassiter arrived at work on time and for the first time in a long time he walked up the stairs a very happy man. As he passed his fellow officers, he greeted them with a smile. Lassiter ignored the stares and funny looks he was getting; to him there wasn't anything that was going to ruin this day.

Lassiter had just sat down at his desk when McNab suddenly appeared. Looking up, Lassiter flashed McNab a smile, but it was quickly replaced with a frown when he saw the nervous look on McNab's face.

"Is there something wrong?"

"The Chief would like to see you in her office, sir."

"Ok…do you know why?"

"No sir, just that…that she told me to tell you as soon as you got here to go and see her. Detective Guster, her husband and Mr. Spencer are in there as well."

"So this is about Spencer," Lassiter whispered to himself, but McNab heard him, never the less. "Well, better get it over and done with."

Lassiter had a funny feeling that they would want to talk about the phone calls and he was ready for them and their questions. He knew Shawn wasn't ready to see them and he wasn't ready to go against Shawn's wishes.

Knocking on the Chief's door, Lassiter listened as the people inside moved around and then, the door opened. It was O'Hara who had opened it and as he saw the look on her face, he started to become concerned.

"Come in and take a seat, Detective," Chief Vick said pointing to an empty chair in front of her.

"Yes Chief. Is there something wrong?" Lassiter asked as he sat down.

"Yesterday, both Henry and Mr. Guster were contacted by someone claiming to be Shawn Spencer, and…"

"And you want to know if Spencer has been in contact with me?"

"Yes," Henry answered. "Have you heard from Shawn?"

Lassiter looked at Henry. He knew that Shawn had a bad phone call with Guster, but Henry's, as far as he knew went well.

"I got a note from him."

"Just a note? So you haven't seen Shawn?" Juliet asked.

"No, what makes you think I've seen Spencer?"

"Because of yesterday," Juliet said in a voice that said you know what I mean.

"You've lost me."

"You had a lot of pineapple stuff in your shopping bag."

"Oh…no, I had received a note from Shawn, so just in case he turned up I thought I should grab a few things."

"What note?" Chief Vick asked.

Everyone watched as Lassiter pulled a folded piece of paper from his top pocket, the one sitting over his heart. He then proceeded to hand it to Chief Vick. He watched as she read it and then passed it to Henry, who read it out loud.

Everyone was shocked by the words that were on the note. They were nearly the same words Shawn had said to Henry and Gus on the phone explaining that he didn't just take off, but that he was taken. Shawn had been taken from them and except for Lassiter; no one had looked for him.

For each and every one of them the words meant something different. For Henry, it was the fact he had failed. He had failed Shawn and he had failed as a father. For Chief Vick, she had failed as a Chief. Shawn was in her employ at the time and she should have at least tried to find him, but she didn't. For Juliet, it was shock. She had been Shawn's friend and she knew in her heart he wouldn't have just taken off, but she had listened to Gus and Mr. Spencer and Shawn had paid the price.

As for Gus, the note was just as bad as a bullet to the heart. He had known Shawn for so long that he had forgotten that Shawn had changed. Shawn had been talking about expanding Psych, which alone should have told him that Shawn had no plans to just up and leave. But what hurt him the most right now is that he had the chance to talk to Shawn and instead of listening to what he had to say, he had yelled at him and now…and now he could have driven Shawn away again.

"That's what Shawn said to me," Henry said his head hung low.

"Me too, but it was after…" Gus didn't have to look up; he could feel their eyes on him. "I told him that I don't want him in my life."

"You what!" Henry barked.

"When I answered the call, Shawn was giggling on the other end. I was…upset and I didn't think. I told him that I had gotten on with my life with Juliet and I didn't need him to just waltz back in and upset it."

"It was then he told me that he wouldn't…" Gus pause while he thought of what Shawn had said. Bother, yes that was it. "He wouldn't bother me or my family ever again. That's when he told me that he had been kidnapped. Before I could say anything else he hung up and that's when I called you, Mr. Spencer."

"So what do we do? Do we accept that Shawn is ok and just move on or do we start looking for him and hope that he's still in Santa Barbara?" Chief Vick asked.

"I think that's Lassiter's call," Henry replied.

Lassiter looked around at everyone. They were watching him, waiting for his answer. Do they look for Shawn or not.

"I think we need to start to look for him."

Lassiter knew they would look for Shawn, but since they don't know that he doesn't look the same, he also knew they wouldn't find him.

Since the decision had been made, everyone headed out to return to work. After Juliet, Lassiter and Henry had returned to their desks, Chief Vick made an announcement to the rest of the station.

"Can I have every body's attention please?" Chief Vick waited until everyone was looking at her before she continued. "Thank you! We have some information that leads us to believe that Shawn Spencer is somewhere in Santa Barbara at the moment. If anyone sees him or finds out where he is, I would like you to report it back to me straight away."

"You don't want us to just bring him in, Chief?" McNab called out from the back.

"No, under no circumstance are you to approach Shawn. The information we have received indicates that Shawn did not just leave, but was taken and held against his will. Due to this, Shawn may become violent or freak out and we do not what to harm him in any way."

Chief Vick watched as what she had just said sank in and then she watched as every one of her officers nodded their heads in agreement.

"So let's get out there and find Shawn Spencer."

At his desk, Lassiter was holding his phone in his hand. He was recording what was being said so he could play it back for Shawn later that night.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	14. Henry Confronts Lassiter

**Chapter 14:**** Henry Confronts Lassiter**

Lassiter watched as everyone at the station went back to work. Some of them returned to the jobs they were already doing and others walked past the photo of Shawn that hung on the station wall just to remind themselves of what he looked like. They then headed out the door to either follow up leads or just to start the search for Shawn.

Looking around at all the activity, the detective smiled and hoped that when Shawn heard what Chief Vick said and listened to how everyone wanted to find him that it would prove to him that everyone still cared.

Lassiter let out a little sigh. He was glad that everyone cared for Shawn and that they would do anything to find him, but he was sad that their searching would be a waste of time and effort since they were looking for a ghost.

Lassiter was so lost in his thoughts that he jumped when a hand landed on his shoulder. It was Henry and he had a look in his eye that, somehow, made Lassiter think he was in trouble.

"Sorry to disturb you, Detective Lassiter, but can I talk to you in private please."

"Sure," Lassiter said as he narrowed his eyes trying to think of what Henry could want.

They made their way over to one of the empty interview rooms and once inside, Henry shut the door. Lassiter had made his way over to one of the far corners, turned and leaned up against it. He was nervous, which was evident by the way he was fidgeting.

Henry stood near the door observing Lassiter and his odd behaviour. He still couldn't believe this is the same Detective Lassiter that took his son head on, only to lose his heart to him. It didn't surprise Henry that Shawn had managed to fall for the detective. It was Detective Lassiter's going from the hardened cop to showing his tender side, all because of Shawn. And then there was the point of lying to Chief Vick about not knowing where Shawn was right now.

"You wanted something, Mr. Spencer?"

Another sign that the detective was nervous, he only called Henry 'Mr. Spencer' when other people were around. Since he founded out that Lassiter and Shawn were lovers they had been on a first name basis.

"Yes," Henry said looking down at the floor. "Look, Carlton, I'm not stupid, I know you have seen Shawn and I don't want to know where he is…yes, yes I do want to know where he is, but…I understand that Shawn doesn't want to see us…me…right now and…"

"Mr. Spencer, Henry, you're right, I have seen Shawn, but you're wrong about why he doesn't want you to see him."

"Is he…ok?"

"Yes…to a point. Let's just say that he has shown me all the evidence of what had happened to him and well…he's getting help."

"Help? As in…?" Henry asked looking up into Lassiter's face. Henry's eyes were filled with sadness and pain and it made Lassiter cringe.

"Yeah, that type of help. He's been getting it for a while now and it was suggested that he come back here and see if…we could help him."

"Then why keep his distance?"

"Henry it's…it's not what you think. Shawn wants to, he really, really does want to. It's just that he's afraid that no one will accept him."

"Of course we will accept him, he's…"

"He's changed, Henry. The son you once knew is gone, no longer there. At least that's what he keeps saying to me, but I'm sure I can see the old Shawn in his eyes. It's just getting to it and slowly pulling it out."

"Tell me how he has change and where he is? Please, Carlton, I need to know."

"I can talk about the changes, but I can't tell you where he is. I'm sorry, Henry, I just can't. If Shawn finds out that I've talked to you at all about this, he will be gone and we may never see him again."

"Ok, at least one of us is in touch with and knows where he is, so whatever you can tell me will be appreciated."

"Thank you for understanding, Henry."

With that the two men sat down and talked. Lassiter let Henry know what had happened to Shawn. What those who had taken Shawn did to him. How Shawn was no longer the happy-go-lucky, free-spirited person he once was, but a sad, scared shadow of a man. He even told Henry about how Shawn had attacked him, only leaving out the fact that they were at his place and the fact that Shawn had gone through plastic surgery and no longer looked like himself either.

By the time Lassiter had explained everything, he felt very bad. There was already pain in Henry's eyes and now, well now that pain was a thousand times worst and there was nothing Lassiter could do to ease it without the risk of losing Shawn.

"I'm sorry I can't tell you anything else, Henry, but I just can't risk…"

"It's ok, Carlton. I do understand, I just wish…I wish I had been there for him, instead of just believing that he had run away again."

"He does understand why you did it," Lassiter said trying to do what he could to comfort Henry.

"I know, but the fact that he left his bike behind should have been the big warning sign for me. I just didn't want to see it."

Lassiter didn't know what to say. Henry was right. That damn bike of Shawn's should have been a great big sign with flashing lights, sirens and fireworks, but no one wanted to listen or see it.

"Are you going to tell Shawn that I know that you know where he is? Or were you just recording this for the fun of it?"

Lassiter looked down at his mobile phone in his hand. He wasn't sure why he had recorded their meeting; he just felt he needed to.

"At this moment…" Lassiter said looking back up at Henry, "I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it just yet, but at least its proof to Shawn how much you care."

"Thank you, Carlton, and you will let me know what's happening with Shawn, won't you?"

"Of course, I will. Anyway, we better get back to work or someone will be looking for us soon."

With that Henry, followed by Lassiter, walked back to the bullpen. What both men failed to notice was Gus and Juliet emerging from the observation room. They had seen and heard all that the two men had said.

They were glad Shawn was safe now, but disappointed that Lassiter would lie to them. After making plans to follow Lassiter after work, Gus kissed Juliet goodbye and headed off to his own work. He really needed to talk to Shawn and apologise for what he had said to him and hoped that he would be able to save their friendship.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


	15. A Heart Breaking Crime

**Chapter 15:**** A Heart Breaking Crime**

The rest of the day went by reasonably slow and just as Lassiter finished his last piece of paperwork, a case hit his desk. Looking it over, Lassiter's heart dropped into his stomach. It was a case of a little girl found dead in a nearby park. Grabbing his gun out of his desk and heading out of the pen, he called out to Juliet to follow.

The park was just across the road, so they walked the short distance and was soon ducking under police tape to access the area that had been cordoned off. Just like always, McNab was there to fill them in and it seems that it was the little four year old girl who had gone missing a few weeks ago.

As they went around the bush that was hiding the body, neither detective was ready for the sight that greeted them. The little girl's body was lying on a pink blanket, which Lassiter also noticed, was lying on a blue plastic sheet to keep it off the wet ground. She was dressed in a nice dress that was covered in flowers and her feet had white socks and black buckle shoes.

The little girl herself looked like she was just sleeping, except for the positioning of the body. She was lying on her back, straight and stiff as a board. Her legs were straight out with her feet pointing up like she was standing and her arms were down by her side. It was her face that got to them though. It looked like she was at peace no signs that she was or had been, in any pain, but her face was white. No colour, no tinge of pink in her cheeks or red in her lips; they were just white and her eyes were closed as well. Even her hair had been brushed and tied up with pink ribbons.

A flash of a camera brought Lassiter out of his trance and he started to look around. He could feel tears in his eyes, yet, they hadn't been shed and he wasn't going to let them. Swallowing, Lassiter took a deep breath and let it out slowly before he turned around and asked McNab a question.

"Who found the body?"

McNab looked at this note book, before answering, "A Mrs. Helena found the body just over an hour ago. She was walking her dog when he managed to pull free and run off. When Mrs. Helena found her dog, he was sitting on the path looking towards the body."

"Where is Mrs. Helena now?" Juliet asked.

"Over there, under that tree," McNab said as he pointed in a certain direction.

Lassiter and O'Hara followed the direction McNab was pointing, to see a middle aged woman standing under a tree. She was dressed in a light blue jumpsuit and in her hands she was carrying one of those little fluffy dogs.

Even at this distance, Lassiter could see the distress in the lady's face and he felt a little pity for her. Trying not to get too emotionally involved, Lassiter started to look around the park. He noticed that quite a few people had gathered around. He had never really understood what attracted people to the places where they see police tape, only that they came. Some, just to have a gawk, while others, to see if they could help. And most of the time, the person who had committed the crime. He couldn't help but wonder if the perp was out there, amongst the growing crowd watching them.

"Do you want me to interview Mrs. Helena or do you want to do it?"

Juliet's words broke Lassiter's thoughts, even though he didn't really hear her.

"Sorry, O'Hara, I didn't hear you."

"I said, do you want to interview Mrs. Helena or do you want me to do it?"

"I guess I should do…" just then something caught Lassiter's eye. "On second thought you do it. I'll be back in a minute." And with that Lassiter walked off.

Juliet watched as Lassiter walked over to the police line, ducked under it and continued past the crowd to a young man standing off on his own. As they seemed to get into some sort of conversation, Juliet just shrugged her shoulders and made her way over to Mrs. Helena.

"Shawn, what are you doing here?" Lassiter asked as he approached.

"I was going for a walk when I saw the crowd, that poor child."

Looking back at the scene, Lassiter let out a small sigh. "Yeah, if only we found her earlier."

"How long has she been missing?"

"Two weeks…why?"

"From here Lassie, I can see she's been dead for a while, most likely ever since she went missing. Have Woody check and see if her little body has been frozen."

"Why would…do you really think this sicko has kept her body in a freezer?"

"Could have and this sicko as you call them, love this child. If I were you, I would have a closer look at the family."

"How…how can you say that, Shawn? How can you say that this person loved that little girl?"

"Because Lassie, how many child killers do you know, place their victims on a blanket with plastic underneath it to protect them from the wet ground?"

"I…none."

"Anyway, I will let you get back to work and I will see you later."

"Sure and, Shawn…I love you and thank you."

"I love you too, Carlton. Bye."

Lassiter watched Shawn leave before returning to O'Hara and the crime scene. Walking up to where the little girl was still laying, Lassiter could see what Shawn meant. A killer would have just dumped her body, not go all out to make sure she was nicely dressed and comfortable. He just couldn't believe that if someone loved this child so much, why they would kill her.

After Woody had left and the crime scene was cleared, they all headed back to the station to wait for the autopsy and forensic results. Lassiter just hoped that the little girl didn't suffer much before her death.

**Thank you for reading and for reviewing my story.**


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